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My dreams are often drawn and look real. The people and places remain actual but I see them as drawn by hand.Yesterday, on a facetime birthday (7th) call to CA from CT our granddaughter used some odd app - and she became a black and white drawing of herself - so now my dream seems closer to reality. I am dreaming of crossing a frozen lake (like the oil painting I created after walking across Lake Candlewood) on a bitterly cold day with my husband. I completed this R/T once - vowing never again - and we were fine. In my dream I must once again cross the frozen lake but I am afraid that due to climate change I will break through and die. I feel death is close - not a distant & abstract concept any longer - I must wear a mask in my dream and no virus is lurking on the other side of the lake. I will contract covid only if I remain on this side of the lake. I must cross. I wear my Star of David around my neck and hold hands with my husband. We begin to walk on the ice. Crack crack crack !! Tree stumps stick up, all are dead. This lake is manmade & originally flooded rolling farmland. Crack crack crack! I want to turn back but fear covid. Suddenly my feet slip beneath me as the ice opens in a wide gap. I reach for my husband and we look at each other closely. It is the same glance as the moment several winters ago when at 2 AM, 10th floor of Marriott, Anchorage Alaska a 7.1 earthquake shook our room violently, the hotel was like a ship tossed in violent waves. Miraculously we felt secure simply because we were with one another. CRACK CRACK CRACK I wake up and reach across our bed for my husband’s hand.
October 29, 2020
This week, I have thought about how Halloween will work out. Since we are living in such a difficult time right now, it is not possible for us to have such big, crowding events. It seems to me that some people want to go out of their way to go to parties and violate safety regulations ... Because of this, I spent time considering how I am going to be celebrate Halloween. Despite the restrictions we are forced to put up with, I still wanted to celebrate in my own special way. Just yesterday, I received a package from my parents. I had told them two weeks prior that I wanted some snacks that I would actually eat before I have to empty out my room. The box was filled with some of my favorite candy and other goodies. I was very excited. It motivated me to think of further plans for Halloweekend. I spent some time today playing a virtual game of "Clue" ... It was a really fun time for all of us; we enjoyed ourselves very much. I plan to spend the next day eating some candy and watching a Halloween themed movie, after I finish some work. I also bought a ticket to watch a movie for the 29th annual Philadelphia Film Festival since one of my friends is their ambassador this year. I will be watching that this coming Sunday. Celebrating Halloween during the pandemic has given me time to think about other events. Although this crisis has been tough for all of us, we must make the most of the good times. When life gives you lemons, you always have to find a way to make lemonade. For me, coming up with revised ways to celebrate Halloweekend has been a good way to work around the effects of this pandemic. It may not be the most ideal celebration, but it works in a time like this. Now that we only have three weeks left of classes, I am more grateful every day for how far we have come.
October 31, 2020
This is a photo taken from the Clinton-Southworrh ferry on the way home from a Saturday spent on Whidbey Island. We got outside, breathed fresh air, collected rocks and sea glass, ate pizza, had ice cream, got exercise and spent quality time as a small family unit + dogs. This is the Halloween blue moon that capped off our satisfying day together. Life is all about the small things that feed your happiness and make you feel content.
November 2, 2020
Early this week I took my camera and went to a stroll after work to Riverside park. I noticed that there wasn't anybody there obviously because of covid. But then I realized that I was able to take certain pictures because of covid. I noticed as a freelance photographer that creativity opened another door for me due to covid, this shot was when I was walking towards the park and noticed there was no-one in the frame and I came up with an idea to take a picture to create one.
November 3, 2020
It's going to be a rough week here in the US of A. Hang in there everyone -- and VOTE!
November 3, 2020
Nothing again has really changed. It is Election Day US. I am avoiding the news, baking cookies, waiting to hear if I got a job or not. Its feels like everywhere outside my apartment is on fire and I just have to stay inside in order to stay sane.
November 3, 2020
Again I find myself in the solitude of the farm and wondering. I love the light at sunset this time year and in the craziness leading up to the election it seemed especially peaceful to be an observer at this moment. A cow with no worries gently grazing as the last gasp of sunshine fades. The cloudy gray sky hints at the weather change coming, as it will despite the spike in the number of cases, despite our wanting it to be over, despite wanting an effective cure, despite wanting an effective vaccine, despite wanting to be able to hug friends and family again, despite wondering if this trip to the grocery store will prove fatal, despite wondering if conspiracy theories could be true, despite wondering if someone I care about may succumb, despite not being ready for snow and cold, despite trying to figure out where the summer went and why autumn flew by...despite wondering why this year is so not what I expected it to be... and yet, there is a stillness, and a beauty, and a sense of calm, and a feeling of serenity as I lean on the fence and watch the shadows lengthen.
November 4, 2020
This past week I started reading my umpteenth book that is politically related. Many of my electives while majoring in painting in Boston were all taken in political science. Surprise! It was a turbulent time in the late 60’s early 70’s. Wexwere politically active. I retained my active respinse - often demonstrating to “save the arts in MA” “pink hats with 400,000 in NYC, yelling f—-k Nixon on the MA Statehouse steps. No ine was pepper sprayed on the Statehouse lawn that spring day in 1970. What could I do this year with the pandemic? I voted by depositing my ballot in the town ballot box weeks ago. I am netvous thinking about all the guns and amunition in CT at yhe start of the pandrmic. So my sign? VOTE psinted from old student canvases left behind - VOTE and think of those who need support from our government. My statexis overlooked - not those “important” states. I stay informed and nowcI may pray as today in the election, November 3rd. The background of each painting is blood red oil paint. We are hemorrhaging lives in this country. I end all correspondence Stay Safe!!!
November 4, 2020
The Election! We stayed up way too late on Tuesday night into Wednesday morning, following this. I am still on pins and needles waiting for the outcome of this. I found a recipe for an Election Cake - pictured above - in the NYT's on Tuesday, and made it while watching the returns on Tuesday night. Baking this cake, concentrating on the directions, reading about its history, etc, helped me to manage my anxiety last night. Fortunately it is delicious - like a sweet cinnamon raisin bread. A new Election tradition in our house! I must admit that I am also shocked that the president has done so well. Given how poorly he has handled the pandemic, not to mention so many other things, I figured he wouldn't come close to winning. I truly hope that Biden wins. However, whatever the outcome - Biden, please!! - we need to reflect as a country on what all of the votes for the president mean.
November 5, 2020
I love this thought, it has not happened to me though I have heard others talk about it and how things are just more active in the spirit world. I love that our being anchored in this time, space and reality has impeded our ability to distract ourselves by leading our “busy” lives. Instead we must notice the changes that have happened by our screeching halt: nature is flourish and taking back their space, the environment is healing itself and most of us are still okay! That speaks to my life, but not everyone else’s lives. I feel deeply for those who are not okay, who cannot pay their rent or feed their families and those that are lonely or feel helpless. I am thankful and grateful everyday and will give up more to help those with less.
November 7, 2020
Hola, los saluda _____ Esta vez estaba en el aeropuerto Internacional El Dorado, en ma ciudad de Bogotá, viajé por trabajo. Quiero que observen las medidas de seguridad que nos pusieron. Debemos presentarnos 2 horas antes y subir los resultados a la aplicación corona app, con el tiquete aéreo y esto nos sirve como tiquet de ingreso al aeropuerto. Hicieron que me quitara hasta los zapatos y me revisaron todo el bolso. Fue un viaje donde nos sentaron por filas en el avión y tal cual bajamos. Ojalá siempre fuera así. Fue más rápido
November 9, 2020
This week was the longest whirlwind of my life. There has been so much anticipation towards the election for me that it has left me desperate for change, for unity and for my children. Election Day is among us and while we most likely will not know the results for days, I am here for all of the sleepless nights and long days glued to CNN and NPR.
November 9, 2020
It’s a feeling that’s been absent from my heart for the past four years. Euphoria, tranquility, assurance. Yes, this is what it feels like to have a real president—one with honor, integrity and empathy. When President-elect Joe Biden, with Vice President-elect Kamala Harris by his side, delivered his acceptance speech on Nov. 7, 2020, I could sense a shift from the chaos and divisiveness of the current administration to decency, civility and normalcy. Once more, character will matter. Values will matter. Science will matter. We will matter, and decorum will be the flavor of the day—every day. Celebrate and rejoice in the healing power of change.
November 9, 2020
This week was still waiting to wake up from the bad dream that’s ever present. The full moon on Halloween was so perfect a reflection of the anticipation of the election. Forgetting politics and policy, I want the nightmare of the division and hate tearing this country apart to end. The vitriol and fear among the populist is like these dark clouds floating through the sky. I stand in the middle of the street at midnight watching the moon peeking through, the clouds washing over it, and not a sound in the area. The silence was eerie, no rustling leaves, no barking dogs, no car engines. Just a world of peace, and calm and possibilities, yet darkness and mystery swirling all around, hiding the light. When will we wake from this nightmare and be able to hug those we care about without having to mime through 6 feet of “dead” air space and a mask? Maybe we’ll have an answer to one question next week... the election, but I don’t think Covid is ready to rest it’s ugly head yet, and that nightmare continues.
November 10, 2020
3 things made me very happy this week - the outcome of the election in favor of Biden/Harris, the fact that Kamala Harris is the first woman, first Black woman and first Asian woman elected as a VP and the beautiful weather we have had since Friday. Walking around feeling light and happy this week!!
November 13, 2020
[K.] drew this in his notebook. I am so proud of him and of these masked warriors who are to lead our country. Amen.
November 15, 2020
Earlier this week I took my camera and met up with my girlfriend at riverside park in New York. She bought a new polaroid camera and was excited to use it. We ate pizza at the park and it was surprisingly empty. We took lots of pictures of each other until this photo stood out to me because I loved the fact that her camera, sweater and bag all matched with each other. Another is that I get to keep these types of pictures and later in the future, look back at them and remember these times.
November 17, 2020
I had to take a flu vaccine, so i made a long detour through the still-empty gloomy streets, to the sea. Standing there, at the cliff, the city at my back, I was relieved to find the sea as it has always been.
November 18, 2020
Haha! This pic is indicative of the pack rat that I have become. I had to laugh at this tree 'o clothing!
November 18, 2020
I felt very alone this week. Some of it was the anniversary of my mother’s passing, some the disgust at the nonsense on the political scene, and some the anticipated let down of the coming Holiday seasons (which will be more nonevents and missed family and friends gatherings) .. these all seemed to push my Pandemic switch from acceptance of this “new normal”, past Covid fatigue to Covid retreat. I spent one whole day surfing YouTube videos...all very educational as I demanded that of myself...no cute kittens and puppies, or compilations of fails as I did not want any more wallowing in failures or fluff...but how many flourless cake recipes, Tahitian dance competitions, how to trim cow hooves, or say yes to the dress silly bride episodes can one take. Next day I had to get out of the house, apparently with everyone else experiencing the same thing, and I found myself in a crowded store stocking up wishing I wasn’t there and wondering why I was?
November 18, 2020