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Mi pareja y yo nos comprometimos a inicios del año, esperábamos casarnos el próximo año, sin embargo, eso no será posible ya que no tenemos mucho dinero y no queremos arriesgarnos a contraer una deuda que no podamos pagar con toda la situación económica que estamos viviendo, nos mudaremos con mis padres en lugar de comprar una casa como habíamos planeado, al menos por un tiempo, así podremos ahorrar un poco más y comenzar una nueva etapa sin la presión de un crédito bancario.
August 13, 2020
Home with the kids. The outputs: a unicorn, a dog with a bowl, and a self portrait
August 13, 2020
La verdad desde el inicio pienso mucho en las personas que no tienen ingresos fijos y que viven del día a día, creo que el tener que comer al menos en nuestro país ha sido lo que ha movido a todos tanto autoridades como población a salir a la calle. No sé la verdad, un poco veo lo que ha sucedido en Argentina en donde la salud está antes que lo económico y los envidio, por el nivel de control que establecieron y por la baja mortalidad que tienen, pero claro lo veo desde un lugar en donde tengo mis necesidades cubiertas, y el apoyo de una madre, no puedo si quiera imaginarme a la gente que está pasando necesidad; ansío tener más dinero o estar en la capacidad de ayudar a quienes lo necesitan, me desespera no poder hacerlo.
August 13, 2020
In the past week, I felt the presence of those who have gone before me - holding me in their firmness and strength. I have been thinking about how they taught me to be who I am and be responsible and steady during this pandemic time. And just knowing that has given me resolve that it is possible, and that I do not need to be swayed by the wind from one day to the next when faced with case numbers rising or irresponsible political management at the national level. I wanted to capture that strength and idea of being a conduit, of being a connected system for myself and my family - even during this time of isolation. A tree with roots in the ground, a leaf with veins stretching out from base to tip, or the veins that course through me.
August 14, 2020
I returned from a trip to Texas on Monday the 10th. New Jersey suggests (because they cannot require) that you quarantine for 14 days after a trip like that. As such, I am have been locked in my bedroom for 5 days now, never leaving. I am fortunate enough to have a bathroom attached to my bedroom, one that I do not share with my flatmate. I am also fortunate enough to possess a variety of electric cooking appliances suitable for cooking for one. I have a small counter, a "dressing table" between my bedroom and my bathroom, which I am currently using as a makeshift kitchen. I have a coffeemaker, a miniature crockpot, and a wafflemaker, all electric. I have one set of utensils, a chef's knife, a wooden spoon, and a whisk. I have a mixing bowl, an eating bowl, a plate, a mug, a cup, and a cutting board. I have two dish towels which serve as drying mats after I wash my dishes in my bathroom sink. I use the toilet as a garbage disposal, scraping uneaten food into it - I can't put it in a trash bag, and it won't keep as I have no refrigeration. My flatmate brings any food I order for delivery to my bedroom door; I take it after he has walked away. Under the dressing table I have all manner of nonperishable food: canned fish, canned vegetables, ramen noodles, pasta, tortillas, pita (the latter two will perish, but don't need to be kept cold). I have some produce that can be kept at room temperature: a yellow and a red onion, some red delicious apples, and a bunch of bananas. Oh, and two avocados (which must be eaten today) and a bulb of garlic. I am a teacher, and I have been receiving guidance on how the new school year will go once it begins. They are planning on splitting the population into 3 cohorts and sending them to school for half-days at a time, with one group at a time in the building, to allow for social distancing. I predict that we will close back down and go to full virtual learning sometime at the beginning of October. The pandemic has mostly left me bored. It is summer - my time off, my time to accomplish the things that I couldn't do the rest of the year: play video games, study something new, do large projects, travel. But video games and studying are boring now, since it has become all I can do. Projects are difficult, since getting supplies requires going out. And while Jersey is relatively safe, it is only so because we avoid going out. I want to spend time with people - but that's simply not logistically possible. And now, in the last few weeks before my school year begins again, I am trapped in quarantine. I plan on getting a COVID test today or tomorrow. a negative result will free me from quarantine, but I don't know that it will come quickly enough for it to matter. Which is frustrating.
August 15, 2020
What’s scaring me most right now is the dismantling of the US Post Office in order to quash voting. I’m terrified because we are seeing fascism in action, and we cannot safely go into the public square to protest these breaches of democracy. How could this be happening here in the US of A? What can be done? I’m so angry, demoralized, furious, depressed, small, large, larger. This is scary stuff. I hope everyone is paying attention. I’m doing all I can in my safe way. What more can we do? I worry for our planet, I worry for our children, I worry for those have limited resources, I worry for those whose very lives are hanging by the threads of hope at our boarders, and for those who cannot truly function because they are threatened by ICE or, worse yet, the unlabeled militia being sent into cities. Terrifying abuses of power. See it. Fight it.
August 15, 2020
I spent a day with a friend, getting chemo for her pancreatic cancer diagnosis. Draining, and also very meaningful day. Being in a hospital in NYC surely heightened my awareness/experience of COVID. I don’t go places where I spend long amounts of time indoors. And I was inside a hospital for 8 hours. Everyone wearing masks, people dealing with serious illnesses, my friend struggling emotionally through her day... and then spent the evening with my children, feeling nurtured and so lucky to be with them. I’m moving into a new apartment in 2 weeks, and am concerned about what that may mean in terms of possible exposure. Change is hard, particularly now with so much uncertainty.
August 15, 2020
This week has been the first week that "things" have started to feel normal. We have kept ourselves isolated and limited contact with family. For us family has always been a source of comfort, and we do not go long without a large family gathering. But this week marked the first of several social distancing visits, and it felt good to see and hear my loved ones again. However, I keep revisiting that first week of shelter in place, and I find myself nostalgic for the peace and calm of my home. There was uncertainty, yes, but my husband and sister (who lives with us) were home with me, the dogs were content, and we had a few quiet days of aloneness... That is what this photo represents. It was week one, and the house was clean, the sun was out... all was calm and closed off from the rest of the world. I felt both relieved and guilty to be sheltered in place in such a comforting space.
August 15, 2020
This is a photo of a chalk drawing of Hope and Love drawn by a young child, another interesting find on a neighborhood walk. Not being able to go to school, and parents doing homeschooling has affected the lives of my children and grandchildren. I have faith that my grandchildren will be able to eventually catch up on their schooling. Other children won't be able to.I worry about this a lot. At this point in the evil pandemic, no one knows when children all over the world will be able to return to school. This is a problem that will be talked about and written about for perhaps endless years. Did people write about how children were affected educationally after the Spanish Flu of 1918-1919? Where is that information?I can't find it.
August 15, 2020
My professional life has forever changed immensely during this pandemic. I have found it very challenging to exhibit strength and determination in the face of adversity. An educator is revered and vulnerable to students. Educators are never expected to show defeat especially not in the front line of students. My students have witnessed the opposite. They have seen my fears, concerns, doubts, and anger. I have exhibited a great deal of vulnerability. However, my students and I have wedged a lasting bond. Students are able to see that teachers are not only their superheroes but are human, too.
August 16, 2020
Right now, the pandemic is mostly affecting my life in that I am very socially isolated. I can't visit friends for worry of contagion. I can't go see my parents, because my mom has heart disease and COPD and is over 60. I miss her so much, and I'm so scared she'll get COVID and die. Right now I'm working from home, teaching 9th grade English. It's really stressful and weird. The kids aren't doing much. But I don't feel safe going back either. I couldn't go see my best friend in another state over the summer. I feel so horribly lonely and frustrated, especially since I see people socializing normally all the time.
August 16, 2020
I can’t stop embroidering. I have always liked it but now I can’t stop. I am most definitely getting some kind of therapy from this. Every night as I watch TV, on vacation, and in the car when we drive for a longer ride. I imagined myself sewing a COVID quilt - meaning sewing a quilt now that I have more time. Nope. I sit and I stitch.
August 16, 2020
I was looking forward to social distancing with neighbors tonight. However, the hostess called this morning to say she had a sore throat. She said, "In other times I would think nothing of this and not cancel but I can't do it. I would feel terrible if anything happened to those getting together tonight. I'm going to get tested tomorrow." She's doing the right thing but we are disappointed because this week we have not gotten together with anyone. Some weeks we have 2 to 3 social distance gatherings. This cloudy gray day now seems long and stretched out before me. ...
August 16, 2020
We did it. We took a vacation with friends. We self isolated for 2 weeks ahead of time, brought all of our own groceries and had a lovely week with dear friends. We hugged! Our daughter played with a friend INSIDE!! I hated to leave. I hated coming home to school anxiety conversations and my daughter swinging on the swings for hours by herself. I hate COVID but I love my friends.
August 16, 2020
La Pandemia ha destrozado todo, salud física, mental, la economía, las relaciones sociales... El tema económico lo veo bien complicado, hay sectores muy golpeados y que difícilmente podrán recuperarse en el corto plazo. Miles de negocios cerrados y empresas desapareciendo. Desempleo por dónde vayas. Y aquel que puede seguir trabajando, debe exponerse a contagiarse en algún momento. En casa seguíamos todas las medidas, protocolos, etc... Igual nos contagiamos. Sólo queda sobrevivir. Ganar lo justo para subsistir. Atrás quedaron planes de ahorro, estudios, o los gustos que nos dábamos antes. Y aún así, si tienes comida y un techo eres privilegiado.
August 16, 2020
My older son has had the virus for the past week but is now on the mend. He was quite disagreeable while sick but I think much of that had to do with believing he was responsible for spreading it to friends. He traveled to Mississippi, Chicago and Texas. It was in Texas that he either contracted it from his friend or spread it himself. Who knows. His friend came down with it the day my son left. My son did not get it until the following day. Does that indicate who is the vector? They had a small gathering of friends at a pool in Texas. Everyone who attended got it. My son did not bother to get tested. He had every symptom - including loss of taste. The lines are too long, the results are not received in a timely enough manner to make any kind of difference. So, now both kids have had it - my younger son in Boulder, my oldest in LA. I wish I could see them during this 90 day window we have where they are immune but both are busy now with school starting in a few weeks. All but one of my younger son's classes will be on line which is such a disappointment for him because he was looking forward to his junior year and getting to know his professors in his core classes. My nephew has almost recovered from Covid. ... He came down about the same time as my son but since he is seven years older his symptoms were worse. He had greater fatigue and fevers. Poor guy, he is quarantining and hasn't seen his wife and kids in weeks. During these last few weeks the virus has definitely felt like it is closing in. I'm glad my kids are in college and graduate school and I am not having to deal with sending them to high school in the middle of this nightmare.
August 16, 2020
I tend to depend on coordinating with other people for vacations/outings, mainly because internal motivation and exploring new places wo a buddy is just not really my thing, but also because these days, my son and I spending MORE time alone together in an unfamiliar environment tends to be a recipe for meltdowns. I found the motivation for camping, however, since I was familiar with a campground from a previous years’ expedition with extended family, and I wanted to give my kid some semblance of a summer something, since beaches, etc., have been mainly off the menu. But like all plans, BAM, hurricane hit and closed it. I scrambled, found another place and got one of the last spots. It ended up being probably the worst since the nearby road had consistent traffic and we didn’t feel quite like we were in the woods, there were meltdowns, my eye swelled up with a horsefly bite, it rained even though I specifically picked the dates BEFORE it was supposed to rain (and why there was only that single site left) and we really missed family since running around with cousins is one of the best parts about camping (for both of us since then I get time too), BUT we went on easy nearby hikes, saw lots of fly fishing and found this really excellent spider fly fishing spot. Sort of sums Up where I am with the pandemic: cobwebby, laced with morning dew. Sometimes I see the beauty and it’s sparkling; other times I tromp right into the sticky web.
August 16, 2020
I've been thinking a lot about doing the right thing or rather doing the safe thing and how much we're responsible for each other during this time. I'm also thinking a lot about how I'm trying to be good and wear a mask, wash my hands, stay apart, not frequently go out, but it's so frustrating not seeing people take this seriously. It's scary thinking I can do everything within my control to stop the spread and yet I can still catch it.
August 16, 2020
I guess it has disrupted our “normal”. While it is hard, I hate it and I have really hard days, I feel as though if someone told me it had an end date and what it was, no matter how far away, I would feel better. Either way, I will continue to take it day by day and although the days are long, the time has passed rather rapidly.
August 17, 2020
What a great question - because it allows you to imagine that this crazy Groundhog Day might someday end. May I ask us to all to choose to think of others and make choices for the common good? Could I ask us all to stop letting fear prevent us from being compassionate? These are the crossroads that we stand upon and will be a deciding point for the future: Will we choose to remember this time as one of heightened care for others? Or distrust? I choose care.
August 18, 2020