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My connection To community? Teaching painting Exhibiting my work This connection Was severed by virus One solo show cancelled 3/2020 Two solo shows cancelled 4/2020 My charcoal drawing Years ago New England Art majors in college One talented student Now a new grandmother! The clock ticks My connection? Begin again Paint along lakes Guide new, young hands!
August 27, 2021
Today is the first day of the fall semester, and I am anxious about many things. We are in person for the first time in my program, and I feel like I'm completely starting over. This is the most difficult semester of coursework in my program, and I'm starting a new internship and my capstone project, but I also have to commute now and meet up with people in person for projects. Not to mention, covid cases are really high right now and the delta variant is spreading pretty quickly even among vaccinated people, so I'm not sure how safe I really am. We had a department meeting with our advisors today, and it doesn't seem like there is much flexibility for students who do not feel comfortable attending classes in person right now. The only way you will be excused from being in person is if you are actually sick or have been in contact with someone who tested positive. I don't see how we will be able to maintain this for an entire semester, and the thought of going online completely again is almost as bad as being 100% in person.
August 30, 2021
SAD. MAD. ANGRY. Yes, every person reluctant to get vaccinated makes me angry. How can they deny cases, hospitalizations, and deaths? How many more lives must be lost due to their reluctance? How can they deny their responsibility to be part of the best solution available at this time? What will it take to change their minds?
September 1, 2021
It may be strange, but I don’t feel like I have a “normal” or “typical” weekday right now and that may be more to my place in time than to the pandemic. I’ve been a super busy “stay at home” mom for over two decades now, but I don’t feel like that is an apt descriptor anymore, as my kids are now young adults. Yet, in the past year, I had one “boomerang” child who moved back in with us when Covid hit. We also had my elderly mother in law living with us for the better part of the past year. My husband and I have just gotten our “empty nest” back and are trying to figure out what that means for our routines.
September 1, 2021
Sadly, I've thought about this quite a bit and I am confident that this time period will be reduced to a paragraph in a text book. I think back to my high school US history teacher and how much history was "skimmed over" or distilled down to mere paragraphs. For example, I remember we spent about 2 days discussing the Civil War. At the time, I had little interest - it wasn't until my Dad took me to Lincoln's Presidential Library in Springfield, Illinois that I became obsessed with the history - what caused it, who suffered, who lived, who died and how it foreshadowed coming wars. I learned none of that from my school. It was all self-learning - from many hours standing in Civil War battlefields, Presidential Libraries and museums. So, I feel quite confident that if a four year war was reduced to two days, then an 18 month endeavor like the coronavirus will be a mere paragraph. I can see it now - "there was a new virus that most likely came from China that caused mass panic for several months. It resulted in a minor recession and the first practice of a basic universal income. And there was a bit of unrest with people not wanting to wear masks. Oh and a new president was elected. THE END." Perhaps I'm wrong, I'd like to be. But I don't think it will be that much different. Guess we will need to wait about twenty years to find out.
September 1, 2021
We're about a year and a half into this pandemic, and I'm genuinely surprised about what I've learned about myself in that time: I'm not as compassionate a person as I thought I was. There is a subreddit in which people post articles and photos of folks who were publicly anti-mask or anti-vaccination or both, and who subsequently ended up infected, hospitalized, or dead. I have to say I'm surprised at the internal glee I feel upon reading these posts. I'm not proud of myself about this. Maybe I should try to tamp it down. But reading about people who were virulently wrong about a public health matter, and then suffered as a result of their opinions... The worst one was a fellow who did not get vaccinated, got infected, was hospitalized and died, leaving his widow with seven children. Someone commented, "It looks like he didn't believe in protection for any part of his body". I laughed. I'm a horrible person.
September 1, 2021
Lots of things! Forced improved communication with my partner. Deepened friendships with our bubble. Increased time to spend and bond with our toddler due to remote work instead of time commuting. New hobbies and habits that I enjoy—my little indoor plant collection, baking challah most Fridays, homemade pizza night with (bubble) friends, increased contact (through Facebook) with our parents. While I’ve missed seeing my parents the last nearly two years (and I know it’s much worse for them), I’ve learned not to take visits with them for granted, and to no longer begrudge airplane ticket costs and vacation days used to trek out to see them.
September 2, 2021
He tenido una buena semana con mi familia. Por momentos parece que no existe Covid. Pero cuando algún detalle me hace recordar que todavía está entre nosotros, siento intranquilidad. Ojalá todos se vacunarán para acabar más rápido con esto, con esta intranquilidad.
September 2, 2021
Celebration of India Day as an outdoor picnic. We felt very wonderful to meet our friends after more than a year. Some friends had put on lot weight some lost weight. It was fun to see our friends.
September 2, 2021
I was tested for COVID for the first time this afternoon. I have a sore throat. It's probably nothing, but because my husband works with kids, it's better safe than sorry in terms of knowing; so we can protect the kids from exposure if need be! I awkwardly walked through the drive-thru testing station, because my car is dead. No result yet, but the verdict is in that I was annoyingly twitchy with the swab up my nose, according to the nurse.
September 2, 2021
Pre-pandemic, at this point in the year, I would be looking forward to beginning the Fall season singing with two musical groups. The struggle between my desire to sing amd my desire to minimize my risk of contracting the coronavirus has been quite the mental tug of war, but health concerns have taken the upper hand. Once again, I will be participating with one group via Zoom, amd skipping the one that meets in person.
September 3, 2021
It's been a long journey since last March. My mom's death, Covid isolation, midlife issues, but right now I'm in a much better headspace. I just don't want to think about another winter of isolation ahead, but with the Delta variant uptick and now another variant, Mu, in 39 countries, I'm very concerned.
September 3, 2021
Los casos graves de Covid son ahora en la población que eligió no vacunarse. El creer en cierta políticas es válido siempre y cuando eso no implique sacrificar la salud de los demás ni la de uno mismo.
September 3, 2021
My daughter started school yesterday: 6th grade, middle school. Even though she is in the same school, there are many changes and she was so excited throughout the summer to begin middle school. I am equally excited, but, of course, I am her mom and it is bittersweet. She's growing up and has continued to do so during a crazy pandemic. We have the same sneakers and I took this picture, at her request, just for fun. I was thinking though, what's it really like to walk in her shoes: age 11, 6th grade, middle school, family, friends, just life. I hope my shoes can fit like hers. I don't think they do yet...it's something I'll have to work on.
September 3, 2021
The coronavirus affected my life because I felt alone and isolated from my family and friends. I am a certified nurses aid/ nursing student at a hospital near Ann Arbor, Michigan so I had to isolate myself from my 2 year old son and fiancé for months. I was unable to have contact with my family or friends which caused some depression and anxiety because I wanted to protect them from this virus that no one had enough information about at the beginning. At the hospital I had been stressed and felt like we were losing a battle between running out of supplies, depriving our patients of familiarity/comfort, and being worn down from working long hours to cover short staffed shifts. Being a student Nurse during the pandemic is an imaginable task not being able to see your peers or being able have personal relationships with each other. I have felt disconnected and unmotivated to learn from a screen without being able to bounce ideas off of other classmates. I had reach a point in my second semester where all I was able to is sit at my computer and sob out of frustration/devastation because I had worked immensely hard to study and felt I was learning nothing. I know i was not alone after discussing it with other student but the fear of failure was terrifying and being isolated at your own house not having any interaction was lonely and depressing. Currently, I would say the situation is better I have not been isolated from my family since 2020 but there are still hardships especially at my place of employment. At the start of the pandemic I witnessed many families torn apart mostly the elderly who were admitted from care homes. It broke my spirit to know they were alone without there families to see them or that they have given up the will to fight in general. I think hospitals should have allowed loved ones say their goodbyes. I believe as a society we need to improve our communication and compassion for each other by calling or facetiming friends and family to implement some socialization to ensure mental well-being.
September 6, 2021
Major stories in the news feel weighty: the exit from Afghanistan, hurricanes bringing record rain and devastation, various states working to limit access to voting. Add to that the numbers of people - including increasing numbers of children - being infected by COVID or its delta variant. Of these weighty issues, we have the opportunity to help with one: the spread of COVID. Why do people still resist the vaccine? Why is mask wearing such a volatile issue? It's difficult to remain neutral on the vaccine and mask issue!
September 6, 2021
Currently it is Labor Day weekend and we are pretty much staying home and not going anywhere. This is basically because my son has been sick. Last Thursday he started getting sick and I immediately started to panic and think that it could be Covid. He was stuffy, sore throat, his chest hurt pretty bad and he had a fairly high fever. On Friday I took him to the doctor to get tested for strep throat and Covid. At the doctors office we were not allowed to come in the front door because of his symptoms. We had to go around to the side door, wait until they were ready and then they brought us in the side and straight to the room. They checked him out and then did a rapid Covid test and strep test. We had to wait about 15-20 minutes for the results. Both of the tests were negative. They said it was just viral and to push fluids and rest. So even though he doesn't have Covid we have stayed home this weekend and just hung out around the house. He isn't vaccinated and neither is my husband. Neither one of my parents are vaccinated either and we just feel like we shouldn't go around them with him being sick. I mean, what if the Covid test wasn't accurate? It was the rapid one and I don't know the effectiveness of that one? I don't want to ever be the reason that a family member or friend comes down with Covid. So I think it's best to not really be around people this weekend. Not exactly how I thought our Labor Day weekend would go. I was hoping to get together with family yesterday or today and have a cook out. Instead this is giving me plenty of time to work on homework that is due tonight! I am also laid off from work this coming week. So I will have a lot of time to get stuff done around the house. I work for Ford Motor Company and we are being affected by the chip shortage that is happening right now. Thankfully I can collect unemployment and also receive sub pay. I just have to wait a little longer to receive my money.
September 6, 2021
Right now due to the coronavirus pandemic my stress is through the roof. As an OB nurse we now are seeing pregnant women that are very sick and in ICU. We’ve had 2 maternal deaths requiring emergency c-sections IN YHE ICU to save the babies. Nurses are not treated well at my facility and are leaving in record numbers only to be replaced by fewer brand new inexperienced nurses and travelers. Those of us still here have to work extra hard to train new staff and keep patients safe. Travelers also need extra training so we do more work and yet they are paid 2-3x what we do. It’s a broken system and for the first time I am afraid. If I or a family member is in the hospital, who is taking care of them? Every unit is short staffed.. now they want to mandate the vaccine which will just make more nurses leave. Outside of work my kids are away from home and I constantly worry about their safety. My extended family here is very divided on the vaccine/mask issue and spending a week with them was not a vacation! I am the only healthcare provider in the family yet no one asks my opinion or first hand knowledge of what’s going on. They choose to listen to mostly unreliable sources instead. And I feel disrespected and sometimes even defeated. I went to a winetasting event outdoors and they required proof of vaccination to get in. Some people didn’t have it and they were very vocal about their opinions. I’m not saying it’s right or wrong but the divisiveness it’s bringing to our world its painful
September 7, 2021
Tomorrow will mark my third COVID wedding. Simply typing that previous statement makes my head want to explode. How have I now gone to three weddings in the past twenty months? More importantly, how many more weddings will I go to that must adapt to the ever changing local and state regulations? I honestly never thought that I'd wear a mask to a wedding. Or take a COVID test the night before. Or have to show a vaccine passport for admission. But here we are. This seems to be the "new normal" - whatever the heck this is. I once thought COVID was going to a blip on the radar - one time event. You'd say "yes, I remember that one time." Instead it's turned into a marathon - a never-ending marathon where just as you think you've hit your stride, you encounter another hill or obstacle (dehydration, get lost, cramps, etc.). Especially here in California where it's a vicious cycle of mother nature (the fires!), the politics (the recall election), and the pandemic. The state cannot catch a break. Thinking back to this wedding tomorrow, I'm not nervous - not like the first wedding last September where I wore a face shield AND a mask. Or the wedding I went to in April where I'd had just half my vaccine dosage. No, this wedding is by far the safest. But like the state, I can't drop my guard. I look back at the last twenty months and I'm exhausted. There are moments when I'm just mentally drained from it all. Given all the above, I've tried to take every day as it comes. Earlier this week I was interviewing a candidate and I remarked that I no longer think about things in "year increments" - I do it in "days and months." Otherwise, it seems too daunting. Right now, I'm just trying to live my life to the fullest that I possibly can.
September 7, 2021
I joined a support group on facebook for people who have lost a loved one due to covid. I have found it to be a helpful and supportive group. It seemed others didn't really understand what i am going through, but folks in the group totally understand.
September 7, 2021