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How is the coronavirus pandemic affecting your life right now? Tell us about your experiences, feelings, and thoughts.

<strong> Almost every time I ask someone how they're doing, the response I get is a "aha" followed by a sarcastic "I'm good" or "I'm chillin"</strong> or if they're really down, "I'm doing alright." <strong> It feels like everyone, for one reason or another, is going through so much right now,</strong> and we don't really know how to deal with it anymore. For me this week especially, <strong> I've been confronted with a moral conflict. My job as an RA started to get easier,</strong> but that was <strong> only because I started to let things slide that I knew I shouldn't.</strong> I'm caught in this position where, I could choose to enforce the COVID guidelines, risk being isolated from non-RA students and get looks of contempt from people that are just trying to have a some semblance of a college experience. Or, I could choose to let things slide, be a "homie" and risk putting my job or people's health on the line. <strong>But no one's been getting sick. And they're pushing the boundaries so hard.</strong> Just this week I heard there were at least 3 parties going on for Halloween, and I bet there's probably more. But because they're pushing so hard, and no one's getting sick, I start to wonder if I'm being too harsh. It's my job to report when I see COVID guideline regulations, but the minute I do that I turn into a police. Instead, <strong> I had decided to start letting things slide, and as soon as I did I was allowed to be a student again.</strong> I started having genuine interactions with the students and I was able to build community. <strong> But then I was reminded that, these students aren't just interacting with each other.</strong> Now, I've heard a lot of people say "I don't really care if I get COVID, I just don't want to give it to my [parents/loved ones]" and because those people aren't here, we can "do whatever we want' at our own risk. But <strong> my teacher reminded me of the handful of staff members that the students come into contact with (professors, staff, etc.)</strong> that do have to go home to their loved ones and are scared. I personally don't have any in-person classes, but a lot of the freshmen have at least one if not more. Not only that, but I personally was reminded just how deadly this virus can be, and I'm scared that if we keep letting things slide it could end really bad. Every time I start to let things slide for my own mental well being I am reminded I can't, or I shouldn't. And I'm lost. <strong>I'm 19 years old. But the job of keeping the campus safe has fallen on our shoulders. I've become a parent, a policeman, and everything but a sophmore.</strong> The best part is, this is just one job I have. I'm still a person, a student, I still have a job outside of my university. I run clubs and orgs. I'm trying to get good grades in my classes. Almost none of my friends are here and I don't have my family either. I am alone, and I don't have the power it make it any better for myself. <strong> So when I say "aha, yeah I doing great," it's cause this sucks.</strong> And as much as I have my ups and downs, when it gets bad it just keeps getting worse. But we can't really do much about it. <strong> I'm sorry that this couldn't be more positive. I hope you, whoever you are, have a good Halloween.</strong>