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Mourning my own as I gaze upon the English mourning The pandemic stole my right to mourn I remained huddled in my home My friends Were buried on zoom. My colleagues, friends, advisors Passing after shutdown March ‘20 And yet a year later I sought To set aside a memorial moment. In lieu of wakes and shivas Along with my in-person hugs I sat through Prince Philip’s service Mourning all my losses in a royal setting Taking time for silence and grief Thank yous for the Royal Family For this moment set aside to grieve. I engaged with the service, half listening, My own departed held no titles,no heraldries Philip’s honors appropriate for queen’s mate. I was gifted the time to observe and reflect Upon dear friends some younger than he They had died, as he, untouched by covid. I sat before the flat screen and mourned Remembering each friends’ kindness, each one’s care. The army-green Land Rover turned at Windsor gates With a bear skin helmeted officer standing in salute I marked the passing month by month of friends And on this day I transformed the regale spectacle Into my own service remembering my own losses Internally I stood in salute and prayed for each My own special persons, grateful for this timely solution.